Satire on Sunday

(c) Mark Sardella

This week saw Barack Obama celebrate a year since his inaugration as the USA’s 44th President. As the senator election in Massachusets triggered by the death of Edward Kennedy took place, it became apparent that the Republicans were going to win the seat for the first time since before the Kennedy dynasty. And with that, the President’s healthcare bill was left more exposed than Scott Brown in a two piece centrefold.

Sarah Palin, talking on Fox News, was asked about the significance of the Republican win. “Well I’m super happy for Scott. But we’ve got to stop Obama’s evil healthcare plan.” A fellow anchor then pointed out that the Republicans now had enough seats in the senate to do just that. Palin responded by asking ‘what’s a Senate?’

Air France this week also announced that they would be charging obese passengers who took up two seats on airliners to pay double for their tickets. A protest march by the Sociéte pour ceux qui ont Gros (Society for those who are fat) was organised for yesterday, but was cancelled at the last minute when Pizza Hut launched a new ‘buy one, get two free’ offer.

And Harriet Harman has once more attacked the Tories and entrenched privelige as the ‘class war’ continues. Yes, that would be that Harriet Harman who went to a private school, and whose uncle is a Lord.

As aid pours into Haiti, the evil Zionists have not only sent masses of aid, but they have set up the only fully equipped hospital. The UN are working on a resolution denouncing Israel’s disproportionate response to the crisis. We have been leaked the following from the draft. “Israel continues to flagrantly ignore the international community and act outside of its jurisdiction. We will be demanding the return of legs and arms to the hospital from the Haitians they have saved.” Iran have accused Israel of going to Haiti to ‘steal organs from babies.’ And no, seriously, I didn’t just make that up!

Gordon Brown is now to appear at the Chilcot Inquiry before the election. The BBC interviewed the Prime Minister following the news, leading to the following dialogue.

BBC: “Will this not damage your chances of success in May?”

Gordon: “Um…do you think I have a chance?”

BBC: “Well, a chance. Not a good one per se…”

Gordon: “Really? Well…I don’t know what to say. I’m flattered. Ummm, erm. Uh…I need to go and make a phone call…”

And a UN climate panel has been forced to now admit that as well as hoaxing evidence that Himalayan glaciers were melting, they also used this to win grants for research. Climate sceptics were seen celebrating with aerosol cans in the early hours of the morning.